netmouse | If I did nothing else today...

If I did nothing else today...

I got gas at 2.97 before the prices soared, and I washed my car and got some recent chips and scratches painted with my factory-direct spice red patch kit.

Oh, and I also got myself banned from a radical feminist's journal because I rudely stuck my foot in my mouth posting before I realized she was trying to create a space where she didn't have to put up with anyone of my ilk (sex-positive folk) while she chatted with like-minded people about the notion of a society where porn is obsolete. (I'm not being sarcastic. It was rude.) Anyway, a couple people there tried to actually engage me in conversation with something other than ad-hominem attacks, but by then I was banned, so this post is just to let people know why I'm not posting anymore, in case they drift over to see if I'm some kind of stuck-up weeny, or what.

ETA: I didn't identify the journal because I didn't mean to incite friends to stride over there and do the same thing I did. It has since been correctly guessed at in comments. But I still don't encourage such activity, even though it *is* frustrating to still be receiving comments there I can't respond to because I'm banned.

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And how do you know Raaven, btw?

If it is

ginmar's journal, join the club. I got banned a while back for, I think, being insufficiently partisan in her direction during an argument. Whatever.

It seems to be such a large club...

Having read her for a few years that doesn't surprise me.

Raaven is a friend of a friend. Not someone I really know...

She's good people. I haven't had the pleasure to socialize with her in person very often but have enjoyed it very much when I have.

===It was a nice try...(I read a bit of it when I had read Novapsyche's post...and then she had someone come over that wanted to curry favor with Ginmar's crew. It actually got me to check a few times so that I could keep up, and know Iwhat I was dealing with when I decided to write)

Thanks, but I spent most of my time trying to dig myself out of a hole that she accurately pointed out I had put myself into (having misjudged my audience).

While it's tempting to suggest she banned me because I was just starting to get myself out of that hole, according to her it was because of comments I made after she attacked me for suggesting she future-date her "rule #1: introduce yourself" post so that it floated on top of her journal, thus demonstrating that I was "too stupid" to have thought to read her profile to get such instruction.

I really was trying to be helpful with that suggestion, but my tone might have been read as snarky, and anyway some people can't really accept help from anyone who (they think) thinks they're smarter than them. I've been told the education thing really is a hot-button issue for her, so there you go.

I once watched my (now-ex) boyfriend get in a screaming argument with his mother about, among other things, the notion that we might think we were smarter than her. People can get really upset about that sort of thing.

I do think I'm smarter than a lot of people. The way "smart" is defined, that just has to be true. I don't think that means I'm a better person than them or that their opinions or thoughts are automatically any less valid than mine, however.

(But I will evaluate what people say by similar standards to the standards that state that I'm smart: logic and clarity, for instance. Appropriateness takes a kind of smartness too - and attention and consideration. I don't actually claim to be perfect at any of those things -- I have a lot to learn, in fact. Like I told

novapsyche, there were lessons learned here, so it wasn't a *complete* waste of time. I learn quickly -- another characteristic of that whole smart thing. I hope I never stop learning.)

===I look it in several ways.

===On the one hand...yes, that is what she wanted, and it was "rude"...but on the other, had she not wanted to have said conversation, she could have had the audience limited, the posting limited...(I have had to have that when I have had folks harrass me. The tools are there.)

===I guess I look at it more from the angle of being a good host of a hearth. My public posts have the possibility of having folks just "show up". The person may not have read my profile, will not know the history, and may honestly be lost, but feel they need to say something. Depending on how they handle themselves, I try to direct them elsewhere if I do not feel like chatting with them.

===That was not the case here....and I admit, I get the impression that the folks there want there to be blood on the floor. Not a place I would want to go to.

===So, while yes, I agree that perhaps you stepped into a bit of a hole there...but the host knows the hole better than the guest.

===Public faces...brings up the question as to just what the rules really are. (just musing. your post and what I saw happening has some gears spinning....thank you!)

I just skimmed through that thread...my impression is that the author has laid down a series of rhetorical minefields, checkpoints, trenches, and barbed wire fences - it's so defensive that it would be quite difficult to meaningfully participate in a discussion there without setting off explosions.

IMHO, when someone makes a public post about a controversial topic with replies enabled - even on their personal blog - they are inviting open (civil) debate on the topic. If they just want a soapbox, they should reply-lock it, and if they only want concurring opinions, they should friends lock it. Doing otherwise is improper, as it gives a misleading impression of an open discussion when none exists - it's akin to (although not as bad as) deleting just the replies that the author disagrees with.

I read

ginmar for a while, because her story of being caught in a firefight in Iraq was pretty compelling.

I stopped reading her, because her brand of radical feminism was boring and uninteresting to me. Plus, she was very accomplished at long, stupid Internet arguments, where every nuance gets incorrectly over-analyzed to death.

It's better to have conversations with people who can talk rationally.

I have only read the one post of ginmar's that

novapsyche pointed to, but my immediate impression was of someone who is more interested in preaching to her choir than in having her universe expanded by new ideas. *shrug*

You may be a stuck-up weeny, but you're our kind of stuck-up weeny! :-)

Aw.... thanks!

:)

It was a good try, by the way...

I am incredibly amused to have been apparently the fourth person to assume that it was Ginmar. I'll be even more amused if the assumption is correct.

Well, all right, yes, you're all right.

Dying of shock here.

When I read this entry, I turned to Fred, described it and said, "Guess who?" Without missing a beat, he said, "Ginmar." And I'm pretty sure it's been years since he's read her journal. She's nothing if not unique. Thankfully.

I suppose anyone has the right to wish for a world without porn, but I would be sad if this were such a world.

Me too!

Um, wow, what an echo chamber over there. My hat's off to you for even trying to wade in.

heh. thanks.

That's got to be a full-time job over there (keeping the forum free from wrong-thinking pornhounds and sex-p* (still confused on the labeling here..) who are obviously selling out the radical feminist agenda!)

Who has time to read and respond to 400+ comments a day, and keep track of who is who's friend, AND keep on feeling strongly for those affected by this obvious affront to health and well-being? (rhetorical question for the sarcasm impaired..)

Just for the record, I happen to believe that 'Who are you?' is defined by a large degree of equal portions of 'What have you experienced?' and 'What have you done?' In both cases, going through the experience of higher-education is a defining personal action, both in terms of exposure to experience and a testimony to the action of personal growth (even if you don't learn anything) by the act of surviving and completing a journey through the ordeal that is college (especially a post-grad environment.) Stating that you have done these things is not automatically boastful, but a shorthand encapsulation of 3-7 years of life experience. Whether or not the experience is shared or understood may have some impact as to what value is assigned to the experience.

One of my most mortifyingly foot-in-mouth, chew vigorously experiences is actually associated with an early ignorance and a glib statement. Once (when I was much younger - I know, no excuse!) I wandered into a room party at a con and made an off-hand remark about "all those fruits" that hang out in Provincetown..... You never saw a more cold-shouldered, stony-eyed uncomprehending expression come over the faces of all others involved in the circle (I'm not sure how far out the effect spread)..

I have a vague memory of realizing that some sort of faux-pas had been committed and slinking confusedly out of that party..

You see, this was LOOOOONNNG before I had any real concept of gender preference and certainly before I had ANY idea that a Gaylaxian Society could be anything other than a slightly strange way of spelling 'Galactic'.

Point is... you are going to put your foot into something while going through life.. some people may be more vocal than others about calling you out on tracking it in onto 'their' carpet.

I second the appreciative comment that you are 'our' kind of stuck-up weeny!

Well, and it's true that you can get a college degree without getting very educated. I rather doubt you can get a Grinnell college degree without getting well-educated, but it may be possible. Still, anyone who has not gone through the experience (or has done it at a large University where it's easier to coast through to pick up a diploma) is more likely to devalue the experience than someone who's done it.

Rather like how anyone who hasn't actually been in combat doesn't really know what you learn and experience by being there.

Intelligence is defined in many different ways. Your fund of knowledge is typically filled by education, whether it's formal or self-taught. Some individuals seem to have the ability to memorize huge chunks of info, others can use their funds to maximum potential through synthesis and analysis. Hey, I just sounded smart. ;) But then, aren't you involved in AI research?

I haven't met a Grinnellian I haven't respected.

It is almost a full time job for her.

She has PTSD from the Iraq incident and agoraphobia is a symptom.

So she has lots of time to blog.

At least you didn't put your foot in your mouth amongst an audience where it actually made a difference what you said. No damage done, and you're wiser for free!

point.

I even figured out what Strawfeminist means...

Which is...?

Aha! I was waiting for someone to ask...

Near as I can tell, a Strawfeminist is an argument (or person arguing) that creates a straw man (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Straw_man) feminist caricature - of all feminists or one feminist, or a specific subgroup of feminists and what they believe - and then argues against that caricature instead of against an actual stance that someone real is proposing.

Logically when used as a noun referring to a person, "Strawfeminist" ought to refer to the hypothetical feminist caricature being used for rhetorical gains, but so far as I saw the usage was to accuse someone of being a strawfeminist, in other words a person who uses strawfeminist arguments.

Pornography, like abortion, polarizes people. It seems to have a "mirror" effect, where a person's worst fears are reflected. Feminists should not fear sexuality. Trying to eliminate porn from society is nonsensical, we're hardwired as sexual beings. Reforming images of sexuality, on the other hand, is a worthy goal.

Congratulations on washing the car. One day that's a goal I will accomplish again. < grin >

See you tomorrow!

I guessed it was ginmar after your earlier post.

She told her followers to stop following trolls home to their own LJ's.

Wow I know an actual troll.

Are they all as nice as you?

I was surprised to pay $2.96 for premium today (it was Costco). Here in California, gas prices should be going down soon as the refiners will switch from our summer formulation to the same formulation as the rest of the country.

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If I did nothing else today...

Ginmar's journal, I presume?

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